Guide The Tendrils Or Lose The Tuber

Children are like the slender spirally coiling sensitive organ serving to attach the climbing plant for its support. If they are not guided properly, they become a ticking bomb waiting to explode. The early years of children and teens are like the tendrils of a solar dragon. The dragon's tendrils are like the dragon itself; if not tamed, it could bring out the dragon in them.


During childhood and teenage years, the wind of adventure and some weaknesses are strong and circle curiously around the individuals, testing for adventure and other weaknesses. If they are left without guidance, or with the notion that the wind will not touch them, we make serious mistake.


If they are not guided, the temptation rises; creeping its way to their brains and before you know it, it may be too late.
Parents / guardians should always anchor and support the weak stems in children and teens.


 These temptations and adventure could start manifesting in the following ways:
Stubbornness of all kinds
Stopping over game joints while going to school
Smoking rolled paper as cigarette
Having some sip of your alcohol or hot drink in secret
Sensual plays with other children like touching of private parts out of curiosity
Refusing to go to school at will
Nonchalant about church attendance / activities
Going out from the house whenever he/she likes
Begging money or other things from people
Keeping bad friends
Bringing home things not brought for them by parents /guardians
Refusing or avoiding errands or house chores etc.


When these signs begin to manifest watch out, something serious and unacceptable is on the way. Be strengthened by the grace of God, and guide. When yam tendrils are not guided, the results is usually poor or no produce.
The same applies to children and teens. The consequences of non guidance of child-tendril could be very disastrous. It is said that if one digs up a yam tuber standing up, the person will eventually stoop to dig up the remains. Parents should tighten their belts very well in child training. A stitch in time they say saves nine, or else perpetual agony and heart break will become the resultant effect.


A hardened armed robber facing firing squad was said to have asked to speak with his mother privately. When his mother came, he pretended to be speaking into her ear, and bit off her ear telling her that she caused his predicament by not guiding him well. May be she also over pampered him or that he was bringing things home which she accepted without asking where he got them from. It could also be that she did not train him in school.
Another young man was said to have pointed a gun at his father, telling him he caused his problems and that he should give him his own share of his money .


A girl blamed her mother for not getting married because she followed her mother's foot step of flirting around, and getting money from men. From that day onwards, she lived at war with her mother like Iran and Iraq.


In delta state, three sons of same parents masterminded the kidnap of their father. The development was described as shocking, but I still know and believe in the biblical saying, "Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it ".
The three sons of the man were all undergraduates, but their characters showed poor home training. Their father was said to have broken down when he learnt his children were insiders involved.


What is the way out? What do we do to get the best from our children?  One can never give what one does not have. Therefore we should lead by example in the training of our children. We should do those things we would want our children to emulate.
The word of God in Proverbs 29:15 says, "Correction and discipline are good for children. If a child has his own way, he will make his mother ashamed of him".


An English adage warns that if we spare the rod, we will spoil the child. Children and teens do always want to have it their own way in almost everything, thinking they know it all.
Some researchers discovered a technique for bringing up children that requires nor much voice raising, no contention, no bad attitude from children, fewer spanking from parents,a cheerful atmosphere in the home and total obedience from children. This technique they said always work with every child.


 The technique involves being the child's character moulder by believing in what you want him/her to be. They are inevitable shaped the way we train them up.
The researchers made a distinction between training and beating. The word of God says "train up" and not "beat up".


The training is misunderstood by some parents. We should discipline and spank with love. A child you spank for a reason and sooner bring him close again will feel your love for him. Most children who are always beaten up in the name of training often become hardened, and would always feel that the highest you can do is to beat him.. Child training requires careful check on the friends your children keep, because bad manners corrupt good ones, and children and teens can be easily influenced. You can even have the phone number of their friends.


Parents should have their eyes open to things children own. Are they things you brought for them? Some children and youths own materials and phones their parents /guardians know nothing about. Remember, when they know you don't mind, they go extra miles to get things for themselves. Be careful.
Treat every kind of stubbornness seriously, it can grow into serious vices. Make out reward for every kind of behaviour, praise or gift, and for bad behaviour, caution or spanking according to the age of the child.


I have never heard or seen where parents are blamed for over- training their children; but I have often seen and heard of parents suffering and being blamed for not training their children enough. Let us look for the dark goat when it is not yet dark, for when it becomes dark, it will become difficult to find.